I always knew my Oriental wife was a jew, after all, grew up eating Chinese food!
Grew up in a Jewish neighborhood in Montreal. My mother is Sephardic Italian and my father is a Holocaust survivor from Poland. I speak Italian with my mother and Yiddish with my father and brothers. My wife, Belinda Cheung was born and raised in Hong Kong and came to Canada when he was 17.
I married Belinda in 1999. Our marriage has worked well. Despite our cultural differences, our worldviews and approaches to life are amazingly identical. We are committed to raising our two young children, and our lives are meaningful and fulfilling.
Frames reflecting both Chinese and Jewish influences adorn our home. We are lovers of knowledge of different cultures. We make a point to learn their languages through tapes and books. Although we are both fully fluent in English, my wife chooses to talk to our children, Cantonese and I speak Yiddish. Between us, converse in English. Our children are identified with their names Yiddish and Chinese, in addition to their English names. Our eldest son, Asher (3 years) seems to manage well the different languages. We make an effort to be consistent in our use of language with our children. We expose them to play both Chinese and Jews, as well as Chinese, Yiddish, Hebrew and English books, songs and video.
With an Italian mother and a Chinese wife, I'm probably one of the well-fed boys on earth! On Saturday, my wife often makes "Chinese cholent," I really enjoyed it. She shops for Chinese mushrooms, lotus seeds, ginseng and various kinds of fruits and vegetables Chinese in Chinatown. I am pleased to prepare Italian dishes, and both, like the Ashkenazi Jewish cuisine. Once, my mother-in-law assisted with cooking, and all we had an authentic Chinese meal on the night of Friday. It 'been a pleasant evening and a pleasant cultural shock for my parents. Using chopsticks is still a challenge for me, but it just makes your life more interesting!
I am fascinated with Chinese history, language and culture. Belinda The roots are almost as important to me as my own. I am constantly looking for ways to infuse more Chinese culture in our lives. Even my favorite show links ancient Chinese writings, and I often take them to Saturday. The Chinese and Jews have much in common in their ethical teachings.
We keep a kosher diet and to celebrate all Jewish holidays, including Easter Saturday. We are grateful that my parents, my in-laws of China, as well as our relatives and friends lay people are respectful of our Jewish observances. My brother-in-law, who is Protestant, had joined us on several occasions and experienced the Sabbath and Sukkot (Feast of Tabernacles), and also had a taste of matzah on Passover. We lai-si (red packets containing money, decorated with characters and designs that symbolize luck and wealth) to our children Chinese Year.We can take a dragon boat race during the Dragon Boat Festival, or playing with Chinese lanterns around the August Moon Festival. When we are sick, seek medical care and advice of two Chinese and Western doctors. Last year I had the opportunity to meet many of my wife's relatives and childhood friends in Hong Kong, as well as to visit its schools and talk with his former teachers. Belinda also enjoyed meeting my aunts and cousins in Rome. These experiences are very special and memorable for us.
While we loved both backgrounds, when we have to choose between their Jewish holidays and observances take precedence over the Chinese holidays and customs. Belinda Judaism is meaningful and has learned to love it more than Chinese traditions. Judaism is important to us and helps imbue our lives with meaning and direction ..
How did we get this right? From the moment we started dating, we enthusiastically explored each other's cultures through visiting many ethnic establishments and participating in various cultural activities. Our goal was to broaden our horizons and take the best of both worlds. However, since my parents were vehemently opposed to my dating Belinda because my religion forbids mixed marriages, we dug deeper Judaism, while also examining other religions. We read voraciously on a variety of spirituality. We attended Chinese churches, Buddhist and Taoist temples, attended by Jews for Jesus, the Reform and Conservative Jewish synagogues and Orthodox events, visited a Sikh Gurdwara, a Muslim mosque and toured Israel for a month. It 'been a long journey but well worth it. In all, there has inspired each other in our spiritual growth and helped shape the vision of another life. Belinda eventually converted to Judaism after more than four years of exploration and learning. She really loves the Jews. One important reason that my wife and I adjusted to each other so well is that we had developed a common vision for ourselves before we got married.
Now we're linked to a Torah community, close to where people are accepting of us and our Asian-looking Jewish children. We were warned by the rabbinical court, who presided over the conversion of my wife that there would always be some Jews who, through ignorance of Judaism, look down at converts and their children as "not really" Jewish. Thank God we have not experienced this type of degradation.
We hope that our children grow, they question, examine and renew their commitment to our Jewish heritage, and also respect and honor their Chinese roots. Who bring their Jewishness in their relationships and raise their children with healthy and life affirming values and practices.
This article originally appeared on http://www.InterfaithFamily.com, a member of Jewz.com Media Network.
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